Tuesday, January 6, 2015

The dark innuendo is flimsy

I had to dig a little bit to get a hold of this gossip, but fortunately bribes, threats and water-boarding were not required. Basically, all I have to do is to walk around east West Buechel and listen to the talk. There are a lot of talkers here, but most do not want to appear on camera. My "digging" consisted of asking "What do you hear about Chief Sharp?"

It seems that the West Buechel Police Department (WBPD) recently busted a shoplifter who had stuffed a vacuum cleaner down his pants in Walmart and then forgot about it."Honest, officer, I have no idea how that vacuum cleaner got stuffed down my pants."

Anyway, the WBPD took physical custody of both the alleged nitwit thief and the vacuum cleaner, but what to do with the vacuum cleaner? It might be useful as evidence of the crime, so Chief Sharp says, "We'll keep that vacuum cleaner at City Hall."

Did you hear the dark innuendo there?

You have to listen closely.

Chief Sharp said to keep the vacuum cleaner, meaning that he planned to keep that $125 vacuum cleaner for himself and to sell it on the black market. Therefore, Sharp must go!

Seriously. No shit. That is exactly how I heard the story. The Chief of the West Buechel Police Department was putting his long career in law enforcement on the line, in front of witnesses, for nothing more that a damn vacuum cleaner.

Who honestly believes this bullshit?

My aching back.


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