Friday, October 23, 2015

Drugs in West Buechel

According to the West Buechel Police Department arrest numbers for February through May, 2015:


February: 2 arrests for possession of marijuana

March: 2 arrests for possession of marijuana or narcotics

April:  1 arrest for possession of marijuana or narcotics
          1 arrest for trafficking in marijuana
          1 arrest for trafficking in controlled substance

May    3 arrests for possession of marijuana or narcotics
          1 arrest for trafficking in marijuana
          1 arrest for trafficking in controlled substance within 1000 yards of a school

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Pastry, interrupted

Within the midst of the political business-as-usual insanity of West Buechel, I find it important to re-focus upon the truly important thing in life, like food. Particularly, sweets.

If you look closely at this Cherry Danish from Heitzman Bakery, you will notice REAL CHERRIES, and not merely that gelatinous red goop you'll find in lesser quality "Cherry" Danish cranked out by inferior bakers.

If you want Jefferson County's best cakes and pastries, come to Heitzman in West Buechel.

Stay away form City Hall. Its got a bad infestation of something dark, unsavory and tasteless.

 

   

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

The dogs of war

Cry "Havoc!" and let slip the dogs of war, 
That this foul deed shall smell above the earth 
With carrion men, groaning for burial.

Julius Caesar Act 3, scene 1 

If you don't know what that means, you'll find out.

Joe Mattingly whines


Stick to bullying little children, Joe. I don't give a shit about your empty bluster.

Kiss my ass.

Dear Mayor Richards

Dear Mayor Richards

You slandered me in public tonight.

I demand a public apology.

Breathtaking display of adamant ignorance

Black is white and white is black.

The aborted West Buechel City Council meeting this evening was the weirdest Alice In Wonderland experience of a lifetime.

Note to City Attorney Casey McCall: All the statutes relating to 5th Class cities were repealed..

Note to Mayor Richards: Given a choice between

(1) Believing the four $1000 Penalty Invoices I obtained directly from the Kentucky Retirement System Assistant General Council by means of an Open Records Request, or

(2) Kim Richard's denial of being a massive screw up,

I suggest you go with the KRS documentation.  

Monday, October 19, 2015

Laissez les bon temps roulez

Translation: Let the good times roll.

Vernon's employment discrimination complaint against the City, and others, will be delivered to the Kentucky Human Right Commission today.

Clerk-Treasurer starting salary

For someone newly hired to the position of City Clerk-Treasurer, the starting salary is $15.21 per hour. This pay rate is clearly established by City Personnel Policy adopted by Ordinance. Clerk-Treasurer is a Grade 32 job classification. This is the Grade 32 pay scale:


This is purely ministerial and with no room for discretion. It is the Mayor's job to take the City's Personnel Policy and to apply it as written, without any quirky unilateral modifications. 

Since the task is purely ministerial, a public official's qualified immunity from personal liability does not apply.

I don't actually know how much Kim Richards has been paid this year, but if it is substantially more than $15.21 per hour, I say Mayor Richards owes the City that much out of his own pocket.

Starting salary

According to the City's Personnel Policy, new hires start at the lowest end of the pay scale for the job.

Part V Compensation Plan paragraph I Minimum Salary


West Buechel Personnel Policy

The City's Personnel Policy, which nobody reads, is adopted by reference in the City Code, which only a few people read. It is unsafe to ignore. at any speed.



Sunday, October 18, 2015

It's hard to compartmentalize incompetence

The Gang of Five aren't even very good at screwing people, proving once again the defining characteristic of evil is dull-witted stupidity. See: Scott Peck's People of the Lie

Vernon has a tough choice to make

Does he want a Lincoln or a Jaguar?

If I know Vernon, I bet he goes for both.

Sometimes I say the darndest things

"She can snort cocaine all day long, for all I care, just so long as she does the work."

I actually said that to Toby a few months ago. You can ask him. 

What type of aliens would invade West Buechel?

Answer: The type who are looking for automobiles and real estate. The brain-sucking aliens would go somewhere else.

Those who own real estate and fancy cars in West Buechel are at highest risk of falling prey to alien invaders.

I'm safe here. This is a good place for me. I've got nothing the alien real estate and auto predators want.

Saturday, October 17, 2015

Legal nightmare defined

When among  the Mayor, the Clerk-Treasurer, the City Attorney and myself, I am the only one to have read the City's Personnel Policies and Procedures Handbook. That's a legal nightmare.

It could also serve as prime example for "Learning the hard way."

How to deal with alien invaders

My basic strategy for dealing with the risk of alien invasion is to not have anything they want. I worry about the brain-sucking aliens and the ones with a taste for human eyeballs, and that's about it. 

Believing the unbelievable

I have heard it from enough trustworthy sources that West Buechel City employees actually received a Five Dollar per Hour Raise beginning July 1, 2015, except for Vernon, who did not get this increased pay rate.  The implications are staggering.

What is the meaning of this?

First, we have demonstrable proof that you cannot buy love and respect. Nobody outside the Richards Gang likes, trusts or respects the Richards Gang. Five bucks an hour doesn't change that. Therefore, by definition, if you like, trust or respect the Richards Gang, you are part of the Richards Gang, or you think you are. There are only five members in the Richards Gang. If you are not one of The Five, you're a useful, but expendable, chump.

Second, this $5 per hour raise is undoubtedly illegal, for a number of reasons. It could easily be criminal, but prosecutors are notoriously unpredictable and slow-moving. The really interesting legal question is: What does it take to make Mayor Richards personally liable for his blunders and overreach?

Third, if all the white employees got a pay raise and the only black employee did not, it means pig bigots are running City Hall.


Friday, October 16, 2015

New friends in high places

Give me a name and an address, and I'll write a letter. Some of my letters are better than others in the sense that some get a response and some do not.

When I write to West Buechel's City Attorney, I imagine that Casey's fax machine is connected directly to a paper shredder, but what can he say. Seriously. How can he respond?

"Oops, I screwed up. I'll try to do better."

I don't think so.

BUT, when I fax a letter to the Kentucky Commission on Human Rights, I get a phone call within two hours.

"Hey! What's taking you so long? We have Joe Mattingly's anal probe all warmed up and ready to go!"

That was the message, essentially.

The Kentucky Commission on Human Rights is ready to rock-n-roll in West Buechel. They just need the proper paperwork.

The Kentucky Commission on Human Rights has policies and procedures, and they take those policies and procedures seriously. They know their job.

What's the difference between cronyism and racism

Hey! Just because I hire only my friends doesn't mean that I have anything against black folk.

I can't help it if all my ex-wives are white. It's just luck of the draw.

Things I can't believe

I keep hearing from many different directions that most, but not all, City employees got a $5 per hour raise effective July first..

FIVE DOLLARS PER HOUR??

I still don't believe it. For most employees, that would be a 30% raise. Thirty percent raises don't happen, ever. Vernon didn't get that raise, so I'm hoping it's true.

When Vernon gets his deed to City Hall, I think he should use the Mayor's office as a walk-in closet and the Council chamber as a media room.

The popcorn maker stays with the building. 

Thursday, October 15, 2015

This is what Mayor Richards thinks

Mayor Richards thinks there is no written proof that he promoted Vernon to Director of Public Works.

He's mistaken.

Mayor Richards thought that he could use Vernon to screw Sharon Fowler.

He was mistaken.

Mayor Richards thinks he can now screw Vernon with impunity.

He's wrong about that too.

The cop who isn't there

West Buechel Police Officer Laura Staley was fired by Mayor Richards in January, for reason unknown, except she wasn't really fired. Laura continues on the West Buechel payroll to this date and to the end of the year.

Laura is getting a twelve month paid vacation at West Buechel taxpayer expense.

Why?

The nutters are driving the bus down at City Hall. Nothing . . . and I mean nothing . . . is going to stand between the nutters and any opportunity to do something really stupid or needlessly expensive. That's why.

Don't say you haven't been warned.

Rule 12


People show you only what they want you to see.


Joint Taskforce to End Political Corruption

Yeah. Talking to FBI and AG criminal investigators last month was a bit of an eye-opening experience for me.

They seemed to be much more interested in Mayor Rick Richards, and not very interested at all in former Mayor Sharon Fowler.

Yeah.

I gotta figure they know a lot more what's going on than I do.

Good resons to sue City Hall - First

I'm interested in knowing where the money goes. Don't ask me to trust Kim Richards or to take her word on anything. That not happening.

I want to see the bank records.

I want to see all the bank records since January 1, and not just the bank records Kim Richards wants the City Council to see.

Ronnie Raygun said, "Trust, but verify."

I say, "Screw the trust part, lets go directly to the verification."

If there is anything of this world I might trust, it would be bank records.

If a letter from the Kentucky Attorney General's office saying City Hall is legally obligated under Kentucky's Open Records Act to show me the bank records is not enough for City Hall, the next step is to take it to the Jefferson County Circuit Court. That's where suing the bastards begins. That's where the expensive part starts.

I'll do it, but I'm not doing it alone.

I'll do it, but I'm not paying for it myself.

Is it worth it? You tell me.

I'll never forget the day I told Mayor Richards that back-tracing a questionable transaction from 2007 was impossible because the bank's own records didn't go back that many years.

Mayor Rick said, "I guess the lesson is, if you're going to steal City money, do it early in your first term."

Wrong!

The lesson is to get the bank records NOW.

Is it worth it? You tell me.

Legal Fund

Wednesday, October 14, 2015

I'm confused

KRS 522.030 Official misconduct in the second degree.
"(1) A public servant is guilty of official misconduct in the second degree when he knowingly:
(a) Commits an act relating to his office which constitutes an unauthorized exercise of his official functions . . . . "

1. The regular West Buechel City Council meeting is set by Ordinance on the second Tuesday of each month.

2. The only requirement for a City Council meeting is a quorum (4) of Council members and a discussion of City business.

3. The presence of the City Attorney, Mayor, Clerk-Treasurer or Assistant Clerk is not required for a City Council meeting.

4. The main reason for cancelling a City Council Meeting is the absence of enough Council members to make a quorum. If City Hall burned to the ground, that might be a good enough reason too.

I assume that either Mayors Richards or Richards called the cancellation of last night's Council meeting. If so, they did so without legal authority. It's a misdemeanor to monkey with a regular meeting date set by Ordinance.

Can you imagine being in jail, your cell mate asks what you're in for and you have to answer, "Well, I illegally cancelled a City Council meeting."

You're doomed.

The reason I'm confused is this: Should the illegal cancellation of a regular meeting of the City Council be punished as a crime, or celebrated as a welcome relief?


The most important choice you'll ever make

This is an old one. The essential nature of the choice itself is eternal and everlasting, but the expression of it takes its shape from the culture within which it resurrects itself, again and again. The choice is always the same. It is the same for Russian and American, Bosnian and Serb, Muslim and Christian or Black and White.

My favorite way to express this choice comes from the 1960s Vietnam War era, and the choice is this:

Shit or go blind.

The personal choice you make on this fundamental existential issue tells us who you are.

 

Abe in a nutshell

I had a hunch I could boil it down further, and here it is:

Nobody is always right, but some are always wrong.

Tuesday, October 13, 2015

West Buechel City Council meeting cancelled

Because?

Dang. I took a shower for nothing.


All I need is money - the legal fund

By now I hope I've made it clear that I work cheap, but I do not work for free. As I have said before, this is not my circus and these are not my monkeys.

There are certain unavoidable out-of-pocket expenses that go along with civil litigation, and I will not spend my own money on this.

If you want to chip in, here's your chance. Nothing happens unless you do.


Legal Fund

It's not tax deductible yet, but I'm working on that too.

Small stuff

Whew. Busy day.

That wraps up all the minor stuff I can think of right now.

Now I have to load the big guns. See ya in court.

Kim's most hilarious screw-up . . . so far

How did I get West Buechel's credit card number, in full?

Kim Richards gave it to me, accidentally (negligently).

A few months ago I filed an Open Records Request about her Notary bond and Kim gave me a copy of the application for her Public Official's bond. This piece of paper not only included the City's credit card number, it also included the card's expiration date and the 3-digit security code for the card.

It ALSO included Kim's own social security number, in full!

This was a serious breach of government confidentiality rules.

If Kim Richards is so freaking careless about her own social security number, can you really expect her to keep your private information confidential?

I don't.

Get the hook.

I don't know what Kim Richard's problems are, for sure, but I do not like the idea the City is paying for them.

Record keeping is a detail oriented job

The person who keeps the City's official records and accounts really needs to have a high level attention for detail.

Someone like Kim Richards who routinely and repeatedly screws up the simplest things in grand and glorious ways is not suited for the job of Clerk-Treasurer.

Damn. I was wrong AGAIN! I'm sorry. 

Most hilarious question of 2015

Kim Richards: "You're not going to freak out if I sign Rick's name to this check, are you?"

Me: "Nope."

Rule No. 11

The very young do not always do as they are told.

The story of my life in one sentence

I'm up to my ass in kittens, again.

Second love letter to a lawyer



First love letter to a lawyer

Here is the letter I faxed to Casey McCall, West Buechel City Attorney, on October 1.

The hidden message is this: Do your damn job, McCall, or I'll send a whole load of crap with your name on it to the Kentucky Bar Association Disciplinary Commission.

I don't actually hate lawyers. I come from a family that is full of lawyers whom I love very much.

I don't like McCall all that much.

 

City Council meeting tonight. YEA!!!

Tonight at 6 PM is another episode of West Buechel city government in action. Come watch city officials taking care of critical city government issues.

What will be the most critical city government issue on display tonight?

Pretending that West Buechel city government is not a fucking disaster.

Meet the boss

Image result for banana

Oops

I forgot mentally ill and lazy.

The Banana Republic of West Buechel

It's sad to say, but the executive branch of West Buechel city government is immoral, dishonest, incompetent, corrupt, self-serving, sloppy and stoned most of the time.

I feel the need to do something about it.

Law school nursery rhymes

The Kentucky League of Cities hosted a four day conference in Owensboro starting Tuesday, September 29. Joe went all four days; Loy went for three days and Toby went two days.

Mayor Richards and Rick didn't go at all, but they paid themselves for out-of-town travel anyway.

Check 1180 $400 to Rick Richards for travel. (Mayor per diam $100 x 4) Account 10-516 Travel
Check 1186 $200 to Kim Richards for travel. (Employee per diam $50 x 4) Account 10-516 Travel

"He who takes what isn't his pays it back or goes to pris-on."

Monday, October 12, 2015

Ten and a half rules, recapitulated




Rule 1 When the shit hits the fan, don't be there.
     Rule 1a Don't be a pussy.

Rule 2 Price your work reasonably affordable, but do not work for free.

Rule 3 How to keep a secret? DON"T TELL ANYONE!

Rule 4 Trust Jesus. Everyone else will let you down in some way. Everyone.

Rule 5 If you cannot do anything to make things better, make things worse.
Change must happen.

Rule 6 There is no upside to messing with things you do not understand.

Rule 7 Shit will do for brains if you have enough luck.

Rule 8 There is no fun in having power if you can't abuse it now and then.

Rule 9 Don't panic. Don't do anything stupid.

Rule 10 This has all happened before. This will all happen again. You just forgot.

Cat farming in West Buechel

2015 was a really good year on the West Buechel cat farm. We have harvested us some Grade A prime kittens.

Want some?

WARNING: Objects in photo appear bigger than they actually are.


Weather Report West Buechel

For some it will be sunny skies and fair weather.

For others, it will be a storm of flaming daggers and burning shit.

Rule 4: Who can you trust?

Trust Jesus. Everyone else will let you down in some way. Everyone.

To paraphrase Abraham Lincoln: Everyone is wrong some of the time. Some are wrong all of the time.

Sunday, October 11, 2015

Abe Lincoln said

Abraham Lincoln said:

You can fool all of the people some of the time.
You can fool some of the people all of he time.
You cannot fool all of the people all of the time.

Therefore:

You cannot trust everyone all of the time.
You cannot trust some people any time.
You can trust some people some of the time.

Short version

Some people are wrong all of the time.
Nobody is right every time.

Yes?

Who can we trust?

Well, who can we trust? Anyone?

Rule 8

There is no fun in having power if you can't abuse it now and then.

Kentucky Commission on Human Rights

The Kentucky Commission on Human Rights sent Vernon some paperwork to file. Just a simple phone call was enough to get them interested. Vernon and I are getting together this afternoon for an informal strategery session to continue assembling the long list of things to complain about. 

After Vernon sends in this paperwork, I fully expect investigators from the Kentucky Commission on Human Rights to crawl up Mayor Richard's ass with a microscope.

It's much bigger than just Vernon.

Hiring your ex-wife, girlfriend and 20 year trusted employee of Century Lighting does not spell out Equal Employment Opportunity.

It says the exact opposite.

You can't simply ignore the City's Personnel Policy and Procedures Handbook without paying a price for it. It has the force of law behind it.






Saturday, October 10, 2015

Bad Joke Bookkeeping

The financial numbers Kim Richards trys to palm off on the West Buechel City Council are fucking absurd.

I owe Sharon Fowler and apology. She was a better Mayor than this crazy bullshit.

Rule No. 7


Shit will do for brains if you have enough luck.

Total devistation

It's really awesome to sit here with the accumulated realizations from the last year and secretly know that I could bankrupt the City of West Buiechel and banish the current occupants of City Hall, if I wanted to.

The question is, do I want that?

The pen really is more powerful than the sword, when merged with a law degree and the instinctive nose of a psychic ferret. With great power comes great responsibility.

I think it's cool.

An insider joke for Miss A

Idaho Kim

Council minutes for September 8, 2015

The City Council minutes for September 8, 2015 laboriously produced by West Buechel's highly regarded and over-worked Kim "I won't do this job for $18 per hour" Richards is twelve single-spaced pages long.

Twelve pages?!!

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Friday, October 9, 2015

Cost of litigation

When it comes to a civil lawsuit in which I am a named party and I can represent myself, mostly, it can be done really inexpensively, but it cannot be done for free.

I'm not paying for any of this out of my own pocket. I can walk away from West Buechel's problems any time it stops being an interesting puzzle to solve.

This is not my circus and those are not my monkeys.

Chip in or deal with it yourself. See: Rule No. 2

Cost of video deposition

"In my experience, the cost of an original transcript and [court reporter] per diem fee for a deposition that takes all day (7 hours or so) is about $2000.  A videographer will add another $1000."
How Much Does A Videotaped Deposition Cost?
That sounds about right. Maybe more. Say, $3500.

Buy two at twice the price.

Rule No. 6

Rule No. 6

There is no upside to messing with things you do not understand.

Variation: It is impossible to successfully game a system when you do not understand how the system works.

Moral: You can try, but you'll probably get burned.

My morning fantasy. Rain drops on roses

Burp.

Litigation seems to be an inevitable necessity, even as I ponder the choice between a lot of little lawsuits and one big multifaceted complaint. That's just an issue of strategery and working out the details.

One of my most favorite parts of suing people is depositions. The witness has to show up to answer questions under oath, subject to the penalties of perjury. It's a lot of fun . . . for the person asking the questions.  

Putting a witness on the hot seat for six or seven hours is one of my favorite things.

Who is the lucky person I imagine sitting facing the video camera and being grilled?

Answer: Kimberly R Richards, Clerk-Treasurer for the City of West Buechel.


Thursday, October 8, 2015

Fair warning

Just making up numbers for City financial reports is a felony. See: KRS 522.050 Abuse of public trust.

Addition and subtraction is not that hard . . . .really

The genuine, official and 100% for sure authentic quarterly report of West Buechel's City finances for January through March, 2015 saw the light of day today. It comes with an unconditional money-back guarantee of not having been just recently pulled out of somebody's ass. Honest. It's a report you can trust. Really.

It shows $394,321.37 in gross income and $226,721.44 in expenses, for a net income of $279,629.76.

EXCEPT $394,321.37 minus $226,721.44 equals $167,599.93

NOT $279,629.76.

Wrong by merely $112,029.83.

You cannot expect a $50,000 per year bookkeeper to notice every little detail, can you?

Cash? What cash?

We don't allow no stinking cash at West Buechel City Hall! Go away. Don't ask any more questions about cash.

Minimum wage high school drop-outs can handle thousands of dollars in cash payments every day at McDonalds, but the challenge is way too much for West Buechel's genius $50,000 per year Clerk-Treasurer.

Posted on the City Hall door.


Yes, Kim, there really is the rank of Major in the WBPD

Read the damn City of West Buechel Personnel Policies and Procedures Handbook

The rank of "Major" is also called "Assistant Chief of Police."

Then read all the procedures in that handbook and I'll bet you $1,000 the procedure of demoting cops and cutting their pay just because an ugly bug crawled up your ass cannot be found anywhere.


Rule No. 5


If you cannot do anything to make things better, make things worse. Change must happen.

Nutters in City Hall - Is this a true story?

Is this a true story or has Beelzebub been whispering trash in West Buechel again? I need to know

Did the City's highly esteemed and hard working Ex-wife In Chief get bored with the tedium of bookkeeping and decide we really needed a hefty dose of melodramatic chaos? Did Kim Richards really wake up one day in August and demote three West Buechel Police Officers just for fun and games?

Somebody tell me.

Do I need to go buy a flame thrower?

If the game is pointlessly exposing the City to a $Bazillion in civil liability for the hell of it, I want a piece of the action.

Psych Central: Borderline Personality Disorder

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is also known as Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder (EUPD) and Impulsive Emotional Intensity Disorder (IEID). It is a Cluster B personality disorder in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th Edition (DSM-V).

According to the National Instituter for Mental Health, "Borderline personality disorder is a serious mental illness marked by unstable moods, behavior, and relationships. . . some people with severe borderline personality disorder have brief psychotic episodes."

Diagnostic criteria for 301.83 Borderline Personality Disorder

A pervasive pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships, self-image, and affects, and marked impulsivity beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following: 
  1. Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment.
  2. A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation
  3. Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self
  4. Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., Spending, Sex, Substance Abuse, Reckless driving, Binge eating).
  5. Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior
  6. Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days)
  7. Chronic feelings of emptiness
  8. Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights)
  9. Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms.

Beset by parasitic mind demons

Woe is me.

For the last several weeks I have awakened each day thinking about suing people, as in "Sue the Bastards."

Civil litigation is the rich man's way of throwing Molotov Cocktails and causing riot.

The most recent version of Kentucky's four Constitutions took away dueling as a method of resolving interpersonal disputes, but in exchange it made ample provision for yanking people into court for endless expensive rounds of torture and public humiliation. I'd pray for help from a higher power, but the only higher power I can see right now is a Jefferson County Circuit Court Judge.

I'm on my knees asking, "Please help me! I want to sue somebody. ANYBODY!"

I hear a voice answer, "No problem. Come downtown any day (except Columbus Day) Monday through Friday, 8 AM to 4 PM. Normal government business hours. We're here to help."

"Just bring money."

Tuesday, October 6, 2015

One of the advantages of being Rick Richard's tenant

The fucking DEA searches all of the Amazon boxes delivered to us, and they are none too subtle about it either.

Learn to fold, fellas!

Do a better re-tape job.

You're sloppy.

The next 16 days starting on Thurd\sday

Aries: If I warned you not to trust anyone, I hope you would reject my simplistic fear-mongering.

If I suggested that you trust everyone unconditionally, I hope you would dismiss my delusional naivete.

But it's important to acknowledge that the smart approach is far more difficult than those two extremes. You've got to evaluate each person and even each situation on a case-by-case basis. There may be unpredictable folks who are trustworthy some of the time, but not always. Can you be both affably open-hearted and slyly discerning? It's especially important that you do so in the next 16 days.

Rob Brezney's Free Will Astrology

Both affably open-hearted and slyly discerning. Right. Hiding under my bed sounds like a better idea.

Monday, October 5, 2015

My penpal, the Attorney General

In August.I submitted an Open Records Request to West Buechel City Hall See: August 18, 2015 Open Records Request

The response from City Hall?

<crickets>

In September I wrote to the Kentucky Attorney General and requested a review of City Hall's failure to give me access to those requested documents.

The response from City Hall?

<crickets>

Today, in October, I received a decision from the Kentucky Attorney General saying, "Give Mr. Fox what he asked for"

From City Hall I expect to hear nothing but <crickets>


Fun reading from the Kentucky Supreme Court

Meyers v. Chapman Printing Co., Inc., 840 SW 2d 814 (1992)

So, more than twenty-three years ago this woman sues under Kentucky's Civil Rights Act for on-the-job harassment and wrongful termination. She loses the wrongful termination claim but wins the job harassment claim, for which the jury awards her $100,000.

Then the trial judge awarded her attorneys $150,000 in fees.

The Kentucky Supreme Court said, "Nothing wrong with that!"

Prices have gone up since 1992.

Semper pro Populus

Semper pro populus is the Latin phrase for “always for the people.”

When local government officials act on behalf of their own ego and in their own self interest, they fail to act on behalf of the people who elected them. There is little question that a parallel exists between fiduciary duties and the obligations of elected public service. The term fiduciary, as derived from the Latin term “fides” or “fiducia”, means trust and confidence.

When the public elects an official, the public places its trust and confidence in that individual to act on behalf of the best interest of the public. Elected officials make significant decisions on behalf of the public, including how to spend taxpayer money and how to deliver services. A fiduciary, who has the power and obligation to take action on behalf of others, must adhere to strict standards of diligence, responsibility and honesty. Fiduciaries must use their “best efforts” for those they serve.

Likewise, in the case of an elected public official, a responsibility exists to use skill, care and diligence in providing service to the public.

Saturday, October 3, 2015

Eaten alive by lawyers

One of the things I like about Kentucky's Civil Rights statute is the provision for attorney's fees. KRS 344.450 allows aggrieved individuals to sue to recover damages resulting from discrimination.  That KRS section also provides the court's, " judgment shall include a reasonable fee for the plaintiff's attorney . . . . "

When a statute like this calls for "reasonable" attorney's fees, it's not what you would consider reasonable. It's what a lawyer considers to be reasonable. You would think of it as being the price of a nice starter house.  

So, basically, Joe is going to pay Vernon's lawyer. Ouch.

Such is the cost acting out your inner pig bigot and screwing around with somebody's life just to feel like a big shot.

I read somewhere that cats have such rough tongues because their bigger cousins . . . lions and tigers . . . lick the skin off their captured prey to drink the blood.

Think lawyers and another lesson learned the hard way.

Lions and tigers and lawyers!! Oh my!!

Ouch.

Another secret of black cat photography

I already know that snow does a good job of making a black cat visible. The secret to black cat photography.

A white towel works too. Here is Polly "Thumbs" Andy


Nightmare on Ethel Avenue


.
.

I own you.

Mutant kitten in West Buechel

His name was Poly Annie until his little furry black male nubbies were spotted upon close examination. Now his name is Poly Andy. He is a little . . .  smaller than my shoe . . . fuzzy black kitten. He is very difficult to photograph. So far, the snapshots I've taken of him look like nothing but blurry shadows with eyes.

Most normal cats have five toes on each of their front feet and four toes on each of the hind feet, for a total of eighteen toes. If a cat has more  than 18 toes, it is called a polydactyl. Jake, a Canadian polydactyl cat with 28 toes, was recognized by Guinness World Records as having the highest number of toes on a cat.

Poly Andy has 24 toes. Six on each of his four feet.

At first we called him Annie, after Little Orphan Annie, since we though he was female.

When we spotted his extra toes, his name changed to Polly Annie, in recognition of his extra digits.

When it became apparent that he was not female, his name shifted to Polly Andy.

He was most likely born feral, but he has no taste for life in the wild. He likes the indoors just fine and he has little fear of humans. He is sitting in my lap right now.

I'll sell him for $150 to a good home. For $1000, I won't check your references.

Photos soon, maybe.

Thursday, October 1, 2015

Playing by the rules

I need a name for this. How about:

  • The West Buechel City Government Accountability Project (WBCGAP)
  • Close the West Buechel Government Accountability Gap (CWBGAG)
  • Nail Their Hides to the Shed, Fred. (NTHSF)
Whatever.

Rule No. 1: When the shit hits the fan, don't be there.

This is my favorite rule. That's why it is Rule No. 1 and "Don't be a pussy" is Rule No. 4. I hate violating rule No. 1, but if the WBCGAP is going to happen, I have to be there when the shit hits the fan.

I AM THE SHIT THAT HITS THE FAN!

Otherwise, nothing happens and nothing changes.

Rule No. 2 is, basically, I don't spend my own money and I don't work for free.

I'm sticking with this rule.

Rule No.3 - I'm not talking about this rule.


Show me the money!

The City of West Buechel takes in at least $25,000 per year in cash from civil parking citations. These are mainly from reserved handicapped parking violations. This $25,000 does not include payments made by check or credit card. That is all extra, in addition to the $25k cold hard cash.

This amount is easy to prove. From my time working in City Hall earlier this year, I've got the proof.

If anyone tells you it's less than $25k per year in cash, you're being played. It's likely more than $25,000, and it is certainly not less than than amount.

So far, to the best of my knowledge, neither the Fowler administration nor the Richards administration has ever accounted for all that cash. Accounting for the cash is simple. All it requires is honesty, diligence and personal responsibility, but it has been hard to spot any one of those virtues in City Hall.

  • Where is the cash?
  • Exactly how much has been taken in?
  • How much was spent, and for what public purpose?
  • How much was deposited in the bank?
  • How much is still in City Hall, and why is it not in the bank?

On April 14, 2015, I wrote a memo to Mayor Richards in which I stated:

" . . . . a rigorous cash-control system is essential. No semblance of a cash control system currently exists. No shadow of any prior cash control system has been seen. Nothing has changed since January 1, 2015. The current cash control system is still unacceptable."

Mayor Richards' response to that?

<crickets>

You will answer to a higher power than me about that cash.

Accountable defined

When a person is required to justify actions or decisions, that person is said to be accountable. It also means responsible. An accountable person is a responsible person.

When a person is required to document, manage and disclose money that has been entrusted to him or her, that person is said to be accountable. It also means responsible. If a person cannot account for the funds he or she has been trusted with, then irresponsible is the word in play.

This is where language judo happens and adjectives suddenly become verbs.

People who are not accountable (adjective) will be held accountable (verb). People who are not responsible (adjective) will be held responsible (verb)All you need is a higher power. The kings and queens on the south side of City Hall have met these higher powers before.

My Crazy Eight Ball says, "What has happend before will happen again"

That's just my hunch.  I call it the Accountability Project.



Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Pride of Man

Best Line: "Those who put their faith in fire, in fire their faith shall be repaid."



Poor Joe Mattingly


It's Poor Joe, not for sympathy, but as an accurate description of Joe Mattingly's financial status after Vernon's lawyers get done with him.

The phrase I have in mind is, "Chew him up and spit him out."

Ate up by lawyers. 

It's a horrible fate, and there will be two sets of lawyers. Vernon's lawyers and the lawyers Joe will have to pay for out of his own pocket. It will be like two hungry dogs fighting over a pork chop, with Joe as the pork chop.

There is a price to pay for being a stupid bigot. The City of West Buechel will pay for Joe's mistakes, but Joe will pay even more  That's my prediction.

A single individual City Council member is nothing. Joe had no business supervising and bossing City employees. None.

When you talk to your lawyers, Joe, mention "under color of office" and "intentional interference with an employment relationship." and watch the beads of sweat break out.

When your lawyers sweat, Joe, you should sweat too. Do the math.

$18.00 per hour base pay
 $3.06  per hour CERS employer contribution (17%)
 $1.12  per hour FICA employer contribution  (6.2%)
 $5.77  per hour for health insurance
---------
$27.95 per hour total pay and benefits

Including all benefits and contributions, Vernon was being paid $27,95 per hour by the City of West Buechel. That is $1,118.00 per week or $58,136 per year.

Vernon's birthday was yesterday. Happy birthday, Vernon. Vernon is 48 years old, with 17 years to go to age 65 and retirement.

$58,136 per year times 17 years equals $988,312.00. That is how much Joe Mattingly owes Vernon for getting Vernon fired just because he is black.

Poor Joe.

Rule No. 3 - How to keep a secret

It's really simple.

Rule No. 3 - How to keep a secret.

DON"T TELL ANYONE!

Monday, September 28, 2015

Rule No. 2

Rule No. 1 is: When the shit hits the fan, don't be there.

Rule No. 2 is: Price your work reasonably afforable, but do not work for free.

I need to focus more on Rule No. 2. I'm thinking, "Defending the Rule of Law Fund" as a way to be in compliance with my own regulatory requirements. Those are not my monkeys and this is not my circus. 

Law Notes: What means "conviction" in Kentucky?

For nurses. 

Kentucky state law requires licensed nurses to report criminal convictions to the Kentucky Board of Nursing (KBN) within ninety (90) days of the conviction KRS 314.109.

KRS Chapter 314.011(21) defines a conviction as the following:
  •  (a) An unvacated adjudication of guilt; 
  •  (b) Pleading no contest or nolo contender or entering an Alford plea; or 
  •  (c) Entering a guilty plea pursuant to a pretrial diversion order; Regardless of whether the penalty is rebated, suspended, or probated. 

It's just a beginning.

Laugh or cry? It's a tossup

The first police dog made Loy Crawford froth at the mouth last year, so I'm itching to find out Loy's reaction when he learns that the West Buechel Police Department now has two police dogs. The new dog in town is a Schnauzer drug dog, name unknown.

The new police dog probably doesn't cost the City as much as the first police dog, because pooch two is owned by the police officer who comes with him. Except there's something about federal law that requires paying the officer an extra hour a day for taking care of the dog.

I doubt such a law exists, but the mere desire to comply with the law counts for a lot in West Buechel, even if you get it wrong.

I'm leaning toward laughing, myself.

The joke is on you, West Buechel

As public dissatisfaction with the oddities of City Hall grows, please remember Section 150 of the Kentucky Constitution, which states, in part:

"All persons shall be excluded from office who have been, or shall hereafter be, convicted of a felony . . . . "

As a felon cannot be a Notary Public without the Governor's pardon, neither can a felon be Mayor.  

Also remember:
  1. "Excluded" is a verb. Action is required.
  2. A guilty plea counts as a conviction.

See: Woods v. Mills, 503 SW 2d 706 (Ky App 1974)

Saturday, September 26, 2015

West Buechel's credit card theatre of the absurd

After pitiful whining and moaning earlier this year about Sharon Fowler's misuse of City credit cards and incoming Mayor Richard's promise not to use credit cards any more, guess what. The credit card used by Sharon Fowler was cancelled. Almost immediately, since at least February, the City got a new credit card with Rick Richard's name on it.

The only difference is that this new credit card is a BIG SECRET. The City Council doesn't know about it.

How did I find out about this new BB&T credit card account number?

If I told you, you'd laugh your ass off and you need your ass, so I'm not telling.

It's for your own good. Trust me.

Finlandia

Its Saturday morning and cartoons these days are not what they used to be. I need something extra special after a whole week of bizarre twists and turns The kitten peeing on my computer keyboard was merely the least of the weirdness, but it turned out that me being at Walmart yesterday at just the right time was a Cosmic Necessity. I can't talk about it.

Thank you Zen Munchkin (kitten), Agent of Fate. Don't do it again. I took you off the streets, I can put you back there and we are heading into winter. Keep that thought in your little fur ball brain the next time you might consider peeing on my keyboard as a good idea.Think again.

The easy solution to my problem is something Scandinavian. 

My choices were between the 19th Century symphonic protest against press censorship by the oppressive Russian Empire (Finlandia by Finnish composer Jean Sibelius) or more pastry from Heitzman Bakery. I went with the pastry.

This is a Carmel Pecan Danish. It was picture perfect until I accidentally stucky my thumb in the icing.

You can't have any.

Thursday, September 24, 2015

The Scamtown Catalog of Earthly Delights

I have set myself the task of sampling every pastry, cake, donut, pie and cookie available at Heitzman's Bakery, one at a time. First I will photograph it. Then I will eat it. Following that, I will publish the picture here and add the image to an ever-expanding fully documented catalog of taste thrills.

I will do this once a week, or three times a week, maybe every day or I might even skip a week. However long it takes, it will been done to total completion . . . one of these days.

Here's the scam: It's a way to write off donuts as a tax deductible business expense.

Ha!

Today: Cheese Danish.



Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Local preference

In the recent past, the City of West Biechel had hired its CPA from Indiana, its lawyer from LaGrange, its web designer from Prospect and its radio repair from Crestwood. The City's current Clerk-Treasurer buys her surety and notary bonds form an insurance broker in Arizona.

I think the City should have a policy of buying and hiring local, when possible.

Thursday, September 17, 2015

My horoscope for the week

Wow. My horoscope for the week starting today begins with this sentence..

"You are surrounded by unhinged maniacs whose incoherence is matched only by their self-delusion."

Seriously.

Must be talking about the cats.

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

The Cone of Silence

Stingray

Is someone listening to your cell phone conversations and reading your text messages? Probably.

Is it the NSA?

Nope. The NSA doesn't give a damn about what you have to say. It's the juvenile delinquent down the street who is invading your privacy. 

"Stingray" is a brand name of the Harris Corporation for an electronic device that intercepts cell phone voice, text and data communications, including email. First, it was available only to law enforcement, and it was very expensive. Now, your next door electronics nerd can build one fairly inexpensively.

One site claims that a Do-It-Yourself cell phone catcher can be constructed for $20.

Five Attacks That Will Make You Shit Your Pants


It's illegal and merely possessing one of these devices will land you in jail . . . if you are caught.

See: Wikipedia - Stingray phone tracker

Comfortably Numb

A 50% failure rate

A fifty percent failure rate. Four months out of eight, late, at a cost of $4000 to the taxpayers of West Buechel. Unacceptable. Inexcusable.

An old fashioned treat

Amanda said the Dixie Highway Heitzman store (4749 Dixie Hwy) and goody factory does not normally deliver Chocolate Frosted Pull-Aparts. She told me that these were a very old fashioned type bakery product. Chocolate Frosted Pull-Aparts are cinnamon sweet rolls with chocolate frosting on top. She said they just showed up on her rack (Oh, stop it!! That's what she said.) unexpectedly.

So, she twisted my arm and I agreed to try one, and to force one on Carmen too.

Carmen's face lit up when she bit into one of those chocolate covered cinnamon sweet rolls. Mine tasted exactly like you'd expect a Heitzman chocolate covered anything would taste . . . way above average on the sweet decadence scale.

It didn't seem old fashioned to me, at all, since I never had one before. It seems all new and quite modern.

When I think of old fashioned foods, I think of tomato aspic or carrot salad.

Why are they called Chocolate Frosted Pull-Aparts?

1. The are covered in chocolate frosting.
2. You have to pull them apart.

It's too bad you can't have any yourself. That's just your tough luck. They don't make them very often.




Tuesday, September 15, 2015

Sunday, September 13, 2015

I'm hearing things

I've been hearing those City Hall clock bells again, off and on. The bells have been silent since May I first noticed them chiming again a few times on Friday. Carmen heard them at noon on Friday, Loy and I heard them at 3 PM and once later on Friday I heard the bells toll. I was aware of those bells (they are not really bells, it's all digital) once on Saturday.

What's the difference between a ten thousand dollar electronic clock bell system and a ten thousand dollar electric gate at the Community Center?

Simple question. I like the bells and there was no parade celebrating the gate.

See: 2012 West Buechel Clock Festival Parade

If you appreciate quality

If you appreciate quality and want the best, buy Heitzman cakes and pastries.

Best glazed donuts in town. Half price every day after 2 PM.


Amazingly delicious

Back by popular demand, it's officially called a Bacon Long John. I call it Amanda's Sweet and Salty Amazing Delight.

I was slack jawed and speechless when I first learned what it was. Once I tasted one, it became obvious. You can't go wrong with bacon. This is perfect for pre-breakfast, as a side to a full country breakfast, as second breakfast or a mid-morning boost. It is rocket fuel for the soul, with coffee.

Only at


Heitzman Bakery
3800 Shepherdsville Rd
West Buechel (Louisville) 40218
502-452-1891
 

Wednesday, September 9, 2015

Officers and K-9 honored for saving a life

LOUISVILLE, Ky (WHAS11) -- Three officers and their K-9 companion Max were honored Tuesday night for saving a life near the Bashford Manor Shopping Center off of Bardstown Road.
The officers who work for the West Buechel Police Department with Max were given the Life Saving Award by city council members for saving the life of a woman who was trying to commit suicide.
That woman ran and hid from officers behind the shopping center but the officers refused to give up. By deploying their police dog, they found the woman and saved her life.

August 18, 2015 Open Records Request

And the answer is?

As I pointed out in my Open Letter to Mayor Richards dated September 1, 2015 and posted to this blog on September 2nd, the General Fund I checking account had a balance of $1,533, 357.52 on December 31, 2014. 

In his June Budget Message, Mayor Richards stated that the City had $1,083, 915 Current Resources Available.

My question was, what happened to that $449,442.51 difference in five months? 

Mayor Richard's answer at last night's City Council meeting was that the City really has either $1,900.000.00 or $2,000,000.00 in the bank.

Nifty. Now Mayor Richard's June Budget Message is a cool million dollars wrong, give or take $100,000.

First, the question was why the City has $450k less money from January to June. Next the question is why the City has $900k more money from June to September. The January number is accurate. It is taken from a BB&T account statement. The June number is troublesome. The September number is preposterous and not credible. 

Personally, I trust Jesus and bank statements, but sometimes I have doubts about bank statements.


Monday, September 7, 2015

To the West Buechel City Council, an apology

I am very sorry I call you assholes, shitheads and The Seven Dwarves. That was rude of me and uncalled for. I apologize. Please forgive me. I was ticked off and I lost control.

I promise not to do it again.


Sunday, September 6, 2015

Super Simple Monthly Money Report

The West Buechel City Council has the absolute right to receive this information every month.

The residents and taxpayers of West Buechel have the right to this information every month.

The Mayor and the Clerk-Treasurer have an absolute duty to provide this information.

It is basic money in / money out rough cut checkbook bookkeeping. It would take all of 15 or 20 minutes to prepare this report. All the information is taken directly from the monthly bank account statements, along with the ability to track cash receipts, cash deposits and to count cash on hand.

A reasonably intelligent monkey could be trained to do it.


Everyone loves Vernon

Well . . . almost everyone loves Vernon. The Troll of West Buechel doesn't love Vernon just because Vernon is black. The Troll doesn't like black folk. The Troll calls them the "N" word to their face when the Troll is feeling cranky. The rest of the time the Troll called Vernon "boy."

Vernon has been working for the City since 2012, and almost everyone loves Vernon.

So, why did Mayor Richards terminate Vernon's employment?

It might be because Vernon is black, the Troll doesn't like blacks and the Troll runs the Mayor. The Troll thinks HE is Mayor.

The trajectory of the present situation leads directly to the inside of a courtroom. I don't know what the going rate for jury awards is in these parts, but I expect to see Vernon driving a used black Lincoln Towncar before it's over.

This is just a prediction.

Firing Vernon for no good reason was a bad move. It will also be an expensive move for the City.

I also predict that the lies and behind-the-back slander will soon pop up about Vernon, saying he did stuff he didn't really do. 


Saturday, September 5, 2015

Simple truths are hard, I guess

The simple truth about annual budgets comes from the purpose to know how taxpayer money is being spent.

So, when West Buechel's annual budget has a single line item "Office Utilities" that includes every gas and electric bill for City Hall, the Police Department, the TEM Building, the Community Center and all the street lights or parking lot lights, it does not fulfill the basic function.

The City has seven different LG&E accounts.
  • City Hall 1st floor
  • City Hall 2nd floor - Police Department
  • TEM Building
  • Community Center
  • Three different groups of outdoor lighting
 Why are they all lumped together into a single budget item along with the several different water bills?

 Would it not be smarter and better to separate the expenses for the different properties so you'd know, for example, exactly what it costs the City to own the TEM building whether it is being used or not? 

There is an "Insurance/Bonds" budget item in "Administrative" for more than $100,000. This includes all automobile casualty/liability insurance. The insurance for all police cars, public works trucks and the Community Center van are all lumped together in "Administrative," along with Worker's Compensation insurance for all employees.

How can you make well  informed business decisions when the basic cost data is so messed up?

It's not possible.

Monkey see, monkey do

The City budget format used by the Fowler administration was an offensive bad joke to high school accounting students everywhere. "Contract Labor" is not a Capital Outlay, for pity sake. Neither is the Buechel Festival.

No matter how you cut that cheese, contract labor and the Buechel Festival simply cannot be made to fit into the box that accountants label as "Capital Outlay."  These are merely two examples of Bookkeepers Gone Bad that prevailed in prior years.

So, what does the Richard's administration do with the many promises of correcting the errors of the past?

They do it exactly the same way that Fowler did it before . . . wrong.

If you get the budget categories wrong, you also get the financial statements wrong.

When you get the financial statements wrong, honest auditors freak out.

Or, you pay extra for a CPA that is willing to blow smoke.  West Buechel bought the smoke.

Thursday, September 3, 2015

Today's Proverb

Show me a liar and I'll show you a thief.

Better than Kroger

Carmen is a very picky eater. I made her some grits this morning and she complained that those grits had a funny taste to them. I tasted them and, to me, they tasted like normal.

They tasted like nothing at all except salt and butter.

As far as I can tell, salt and butter is the only taste grits ever has, but to Carmen these grits tasted "funny."

OK . . . . fine.  Nobody can be asked to eat funny tasting grits, so we moved to some other options on the menu. Just yesterday I got one of those good looking cantaloupes Jeanie had grown in the Community Garden. I offered half of that cantaloupe to Carmen and, sure, she'd give it a shot. Cantaloupes are good and anything would be better then funny tasting grits.

Bingo! We have a winner!

Carmen was very please with that cantaloupe. She said it was better than any cantaloupe we ever bought from Kroger. Carmen was happy. When Carmen is happy, I am happy.

It will be a very good day today that starts off with Carmen being happy. I will forever be grateful for Jeanie's cantaloupes.

Please do not read anything into that statement that is not there to begin with. Here's pic of that cantaloupe,

Note to self: Uses for the Community Center

Hot dog! This really is the 21st Century.

Applications for unemployment benefits can be filed online. The Community Center has computers, Internet access, air conditioning and a coffee maker. What more do you need?

I think it would be very difficult to fill out an unemployment application online with only a smartphone.

I'll never know about that for sure, though. I am very old fashioned.

Telephones are for talking, I HATE telephones and I'll never, ever, buy a "smart" one.

Inside the Community Center


Parental photo permissions on file.

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

An open letter to Mayor Richards

 I sent this letter to Mayor Richards more than 24 hours ago and, so far, not a peep in response. I could wait another 24 hours and hope for a freaking miracle, but I'm impatient these days, so here it is. I really don't expect an answer.

More questions that will never be answered

Monthly reports and payments to the Kentucky Retirement System must be made on or before the 10th of the following month. If they are late, there is a minimum $1,000 penalty.

I see West Buechel's payment for March was made on March, 23, thirteen days late. The May payment was not made until May, 26, more than two weeks late. June's payment was a close miss on the 12th that was merely 2 days late. I don't have information on the January, February, April, July or August payments.

That's at least $3,000 of taxpayer money flushed down the toilet for no reason other than gross sloppiness because of .  .  .  what?

There is no excuse. There is no justification. This should never happen, but you are not supposed to ever notice, and for pity sake, DO NOT ASK ANY QUESTIONS.

Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Economicalizing the audit expense efficiencies

Be wise.

Don't pay twice for the same thing.

The special audit examination of the Fowler administration's financial wingding goes through December 31, 2014, when she retired from public life forever. July1, 2014 through December 31, 2014 is exactly one-half of the City's 2014-2015 fiscal year.

Since the Kentucky Auditor of Public Accounts is already examining the financial records from that time period, and learning the quirkiness of West Buechel's government record keeping, it make no sense to hire anyone else to do the same thing all over again.

I say the State Auditor should also do the City's annual audit of financial statements.

What financial statements am I talking about? The ones that G*d will drop from the sky in about 30 days.

" . . . . each city shall, after the close of each fiscal year, cause each fund of the city to be audited by the Auditor of Public Accounts or a certified public accountant. . . . " KRS 91A.040(1)

Monday, August 31, 2015

It's not a screw-up, it's just a boo-boo

Just for the moment, let's set aside the fact West Buechel's annual ad valorem tax (property tax) ordinance is D.O.A. for lack of a second reading on a different day. Let's look at the text of the ordinance itself, which adopts the Jefferson County Property Valuation Administrator's (PVA) annual assessment.

By state statute, the default property assessment date is set on January 1 of each year, and this is the assessment date used by the Jefferson County PVA. However, West Buechel's Ordinance 263 Series 2015, which was sorta almost enacted in June, sets the City's assessment date at July 1, 2015.

I think that this is a problem. I think it is an irreconcilable fatal error to adopt the Jefferson County PVA assessment of January 1, 2015 and then specify a different assessment date of July 1.

It's not a screw-up because it can be fixed. For now it is merely a boo-boo. It's an embarrassing and goofy boo-boo, but what can you expect from a Dope Lawyer?

If it is not fixed, it then become an expensive screw-up  Someone will take it to court and melt that goofy Ordinance 263 to slag with a blow torch. No property taxes this year, and the City loses about $300,000 in revenue.

I might have to squeeze that $300,000 out of the City Attorney, like squeezing juice out of a lemon

Wow. Now that think about it, doing that could be a lot of fun.

Nevermind. Looks good to me. Let it slide.

City Attorney School for Dope Lawyers

Everyone knows that the annual financial statement for the City of West Buechel must be audited, the audit report must be presented to the City Council and the report must be published. Everyone knows this, right?

Maybe not. 

The audit report for FY 2013 - 2014 was prepared on time and many copies were available the first week of January, 2015. Sharon Fowler did her part.

Was the audit report presented to the City Council?

I don't think so.

Was the audit report published?

I don't think so.

Is this a legal problem?

Ask the City Attorney about it next chance you get.




Saturday, August 29, 2015

What the West Buechel City Council needs to know

The City of West Buechel has eleven different bank accounts that I know of for sure.

The City Clerk-Treasurer is providing the Council with information about only one of them.

Not AGAIN!!!

For the last full year of Sharon Fowler's term as Mayor of West Buechel, the City had a large cash reserve in the General Fund.  The City started 2014 with $1,704,978.17 in the checking account and ended the year with $1,533,357.52.when Rick Richards took office..

 The average cash on hand for any month during 2014 was about $1.6 million.

I know this because I have scanned copies of every bank statement and every check for the entire year. I know where every penny that Sharon Fowler spent went, and Sharon Fowler was not shy about spending money. Her personal kitchen in the TEM building and the electric fireplace in her second suite of offices outside City Hall are my favorite examples of Queen Sharon's self-indulgent "screw you" attitude about taxpayer money.

However, according to Mayor Richard's June budget proposal, the City had only $1,083,815 in "Current Resources Available."

Hummmm.

Hey, Mayor Richards, according to my calculations, that's a half million dollars less than what you started the year with.

What's up with that?

Does anyone on the City Council know?

Does anyone on the City Council care?

Where did that $500k go? Outer space?




Tuesday, August 25, 2015

Mayor Richards, please fire this fool

Rick -

In the minutes for the June 9th regular meeting of the West Buechel City Council, I read:

"Attorney McCall stated the (sic) we are officially scheduling s special meeting for the purpose of discussing the budget on June 23, 2015, at 5:00 p.m. Further, he stated that this announcement in open meeting would satisfy notice requirements to the media, etc. per KRS 61 . . . . "

WRONG!!

That is sooooooooo painfully WRONG that it almost makes me cry.

Attorney McCall is a train wreck waiting to happen.

Attorney McCall is LESS competent with Kentucky municipal law than was Gen-NON before him, which I had scarcely thought possible. West Buechel deserves a competent City Attorney, and Casey McCall will never make the grade.

Please replace Casey McCall with ANYONE else

666666666666666666666666666666666666666666666666666666666666666666666666

Oops. Kitten on keyboard.



 

Sunday, August 23, 2015

Stories from The Headless Chicken - 1

Moved here

Won't Get Fooled Again

Burn it down.

Strange days and Grass Monsters







Mayor Richards contacted an east end lawn mowing company for a bid to service all of West Buechel's grass cutting needs.

The really bizarre part of the bid request was that it included the Shepherdsville Road highway right-of-way outside West Buechel's City limits, between Shepherdsville Rd. and Shelton Ave.

What's up with this?

Meet the new boss. Same as the old boss. 
We won't get fooled again.




Old farts and children

4 AM on a Sunday morning is good time to think about the infinite possibilities of life and how things could work better.

I'm thinking that West Buechel's Community Center is an outstanding neighborhood asset (with or without a new radio controlled Ten Thousand Dollar gate) that could be use more fully with just a little bit of planning and effort.

I'm thinking that the local seniors (there are a few around) could use the Community Center's Internet access to learn a few new tricks without spending a lot of money they cannot afford and don't want to spend.   

I'm thinking the little children could use more help with their school work and volunteers could be organized to provide the help.

I'm also thinking I'm not getting anywhere near someone's little child without a video camera recording every move. There a a few folk around town with evil minds and wicked tongues, who like to imagine the worst and then talk about it.

I've met such people in West Buechel. Hard to imagine, but it's true.

Saturday, August 22, 2015

Wordplay: Persiflage

Thanks to Amanda at Heitzman Bakery, I learned a new word.

Persiflage (n):Light and slightly contemptuous mockery or banter.

I like it. Thanks, Amanda.